Daydream
by Athyra
Summary: Sometimes You wonders if she's still dreaming, or everything's just a living nightmare. [Based off of Daydream Warrior; centered around the SecondVerseQuartet (Mari, You, Chika, Kanan)] onesided YouChika, ChikaKanan, KanaRiko, Riko x ?; with mentions of YouMari & KanaMari, and implied DiaYoshi & Maruby
1. I - Mari

**A/N** : Moving this from my tumblr just so I can get that 1/1/17 date stamp haha and also feedback would be appreciated! I haven't written such type of story for a while.

 **Note:** This is based off of _Daydream Warrior_ and a fanart I did; rather than the tsurime trio, this is centered around the SecondVerseQuartet (Mari, You, Chika, Kanan). The story won't be long, it's broken down into 9 hopefully short chapters. **This story will be mostly told through You's POV.**  
 **Warning** : Profanity, violence and sex.  
 **Ships** : (onesided) YouChikaKananRiko?; with mentions of YouMari & KanaMari, and implied DiaYoshi & Maruby

* * *

 **I. Mari**

 _"Feigning not hearing the voice of my heart"  
As I run, my contradictions waver"_

* * *

 _Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz._

A slender yet muscular arm reached out from under the duvet, searching for the quietly vibrating phone on the nightstand. A mess of light-grey hair popped up afterwards, followed by a groan that morphed into a yawn half way. You stared blankly at her phone and wondered what time it was, for her memories were still rather hazy.

 _[Gomen, You-chan, did I wake you?]_

Upon seeing the cutesy dog sticker on the screen, all the fatigue drained from her blue eyes. Her lips curving into a fond smile as she hastily texted back.

 _[Nah, I should've been up already.]_

 _[Woah, it's almost noon!]_

She could never get used to the waiting in between texts, whether the interval was long or not. There had been conversations that were only read and never answered, and just thinking about it made her clench her phone in trepidation. To her relief, she received her response within seconds.

 _[Mou, Sleepyhead! You didn't forget about your promise later, have you?]_

The giddy joy died away and her stomach churned. She inhaled deeply and forced her shaking thumb to type out an acceptably reply.

 _[Of course not. I'll meet you in front of the shop at 1pm.]_

When the message box showed "read" beside it, the covers rustled and You tensed instinctively before forcing herself to relax. A pair of creamy white arms wrapped around her waist and endowed breasts were pressed provocatively against her back. "Oho, a date with Chikacchi~?"

"It's not a date," You said flatly, and exhaled in mild exasperation as the voluptuous girl played with her disheveled hair and prodded at her cheeks. "We're just going shopping, that's all."

"Still sounds like a date to me."

"It's not," she growled and held the flippant girl's wrist in a vice grip. "She's shopping for a present for _her,_ " she could not hide the disgust in her tone. "To cheer _her_ up, Chika-chan said. I'm just an escort, nothing more."

"Ah." Golden tresses tickled against her neck as the blonde rested her chin upon You's shoulder. "You are jealous, hmm?"

You hated the rhetorical tone and how those words were utterly correct. "Are you, Mari-chan?"

"Why would I be?" Mari's breathy giggle brushed against You's ear, making it tingle pleasantly as heat crawled up her neck. "After all, Kanan still seeks my bed on cold, dark nights. But you, my poor dear, Chikacchi still has no idea about your feelings."

You's blood boiled in rage upon hearing that accursed name. Kanan. _It's her. It's always her._ She threw her phone aside, careless of the way it bounced off the mattress and onto the carpeted floor. "That's fucked up. You're nothing but fuck-buddies."

"As are we, You-chan." Mari nibbled at her earlobe in that infuriatingly teasing way that only she knew how.

"Don't compare me to her." You's fingers dug into the blanket, pouring her irritation as she fleetingly fantasized ripping the unfortunate fabric apart.

"It's a fact and you know it." Mari lightly placed her hands over You's, and the fight deflated out of her.

"No, you're not just-!" You spun around and stared severely at the blonde. As always, her expression was unreadable, perpetually masked in humor. "I mean, yes, we're… but you also mean to me more than that."

"Aww, I'm flattered. You're such a cutie, makes me wanna eat you up again."

You sighed at Mari's airy response. "Seriously though, what do you want from… her? From me?"

"Same thing as you do. Someone to share your joy and pain, someone to talk to… someone to hug," she smiled and tilted her head, allowing her bangs to drape over her glimmering chartreuse eyes. She looked sad and very human then.

She was beautiful.

"Right. I understand. If it weren't for you, I don't know where I'd be," You whispered darkly as she cupped Mari's warm cheek, smiling when the latter leaned into her touch. "Maybe somewhere in jail?"

 _Pained groans. The cringe-worthy thuds of fist hitting flesh. Never-ending rain weeping from the dark sky. Blood splattering onto the concrete wall and asphalt ground. It wasn't murderous rage that fueled her strikes, but a cold and rather simple desire._

 _She just wanted to hurt. Whether it was other people or herself she did not know._

 _But ah. People might really die if she continued. Human lives were so very fragile. She knew that._

 _A hand pulled at her collar and, instinctively, she moved to throw the unknown assailant over her shoulder. She stopped abruptly when she saw a handkerchief shoved in front of her face._

 _"…? I don't need that. That's not enough to wipe my hands anyway," You smirked humorlessly and finally stared at her hands, which were covered in slick maroon. She probably had bruises and cuts elsewhere but bandages shall suffice._

 _"It's not for your hands, silly." The newcomer had a particular way of giggling that both irked and amused You at the same time, and she found herself letting down her guard. She flinched in confusion when the handkerchief gently dabbed at her wet eyes._

 _"I know it's not rain."_

 _You frowned, incensed that this blonde stranger saw her in such a pathetic state._

 _"Come on. You need to get out of here. Follow me."_

You chuckled hoarsely at the vivid memory. It still felt so real as if it had only happened yesterday. "I definitely would have killed those fuckers if you hadn't stopped me. Like,' oops, too bad so sad, it happened'. Thanks to you, it didn't."

"Please, you give me too much credit, though I certainly don't mind the attention~"

"What I don't understand is," You whimsically traced the outline of Mari's jaw, her knuckles gently caressing down her neck and over her clavicles. "Why do good people like you and Chika-chan love someone like _her_?"

Mari let out a sultry chuckle that made You's throat parched and her body heat up. She fought down the urge to gulp when the blonde leaned in and stared harshly into her eyes. That jokester demeanor was nowhere to be seen, and it was rather frightening. Not that You had any doubts of being able to physically overpower this girl, but still.

"I can't speak for Chikacchi, but let me reiterate it for you again, Watanabe You."

You disliked that fact that she _liked_ the way Mari uttered her full name.

"I'm not a good person. Oh yes, I am far from good, it will do you well to remember that."

You kissed her hard then and there. Treacherous yearning filled her buzzing mind as she forcefully pushed the blonde down onto the mattress, their naked limbs becoming entangled once more. The pleasurable exchange and friction of hot skin numbed the pain in her chest. Once again, she was able to forget, at least for awhile, that heavy and prickly pain which always appeared whenever Chika mentioned Matsuura fucking Kanan.

"Do you think I care?" She muttered against Mari's lips, and licked them rather tenderly when the latter smiled.

"I suppose not." The blonde impishly bit her tongue and grinned into the rough kiss that followed. She tasted sweet. She tasted like pain. It was a sinful combination that drove You wild. Their movements became more frantic as words were quickly replaced by primal sounds.

You almost wanted to ask if Mari ever thought about Kanan whenever they had sex, but swallowed the question and drowned herself in their carnal desires. It wasn't as if she never imagined Chika's face and voice after all.

They were both hopeless, weren't they?

Perhaps everything was just a nightmare.

Yeah, right.


	2. II - Chika

**A/N:** Thanks for reading and any feedback is welcome! I'm hoping to make this story a weekly update but we'll see...

* * *

 **II. Chika**

 _"Why did I meet you?_

 _I felt a definite link between us"_

* * *

"Hello, earth to You-chan~?"

"Ah, gomen, Chika-chan."

"You're daydreaming again… is shopping with me so boring?"

You only chuckled and shook her head. Her lack of response made her orange-haired companion huff and stomp in playful annoyance. Chika was always full of energy and reacted to everything earnestly. There was never a dull moment with this pure-hearted, mikan-loving girl.

 _She's a good girl. She's such a good girl, yet…_

Blue eyes glared at the ground, willing to burn a hole then and there so that she could jump in and would not have to endure this torture any longer. Or she could throw that accursed Kanan in and be done with it all, heh.

Soft, dainty hands waved in front of her face, prompting her to look at Chika in the eyes at last. The girl of her dreams now looked concerned, rather than disgruntled as her tone suggested.

"You-chan, are you really okay? Y-You got into a fight again, didn't you?"

You stopped Chika's hand before it could touch the small bandage on her neck that wasn't covered by her scarf. "No, and I'm okay. I just slept late last night, that's all."

Chika scrunched up her face to an adorable pout. She appeared so innocent then, so trusting and full of zeal that half of You wished to embrace her and never let go. As if such gesture could siphon a bit of light and goodness into her jaded soul too.

The other half of her _so_ wanted to break Chika's purity.

Imagine what her reaction would be, if she were told about the hickie behind the bandage? You suppressed a shiver as she recalled Mari's phantom warmth against her skin and those supple lips upon her neck. Oh yes, what would Chika think?

"Are you cold, You-chan? I know you don't like the cold," Chika was still frowning as she tugged at You's scarf and wrapped it more snugly around the latter. "Here, lemme warm your hands!"

Sighing, You allowed herself a brief moment in which she indulged in the sensation of having her hands caressed by the girl she loved. All those fleeting fantasies of destroying Chika's innocence were gone, leaving behind that prickly shame for daring to imagine such a thing. She had to fight every fibre of her being not to interlace their fingers, and instead, she gently squeezed Chika's hands once before letting go.

"Thanks, Chika-chan. Now, let's… let's get back on track. How about this one?"

Without waiting for her companion's answer, she entered a quaint shop full of small trinkets and antique ornaments. You pretended to look focused, nodding and grunting every now and then to show that she was listening to Chika. However, she was only concentrating on her beloved's energetic voice, not the words themselves.

Why the fuck would she want to hear more about Matsuura Kanan?

Even then, she was but a mere human, and her brain still automatically absorbed those words and forced her to bask in Chika's infatuation with Kanan yet again. No, not simply infatuation. You recognized that look in Chika's eyes, something she saw whenever she stared at the mirror. Chika did love that person, just as You loved her dearly.

"Hehe, Kanan-chan almost smiled when I told her about that new restaurant three blocks away from the station. I knew it, that sashimi-loving side of her is still in there somewhere, I just need to coax it out!"

You stuffed her hands into her coat's pockets to hide her clenched fists. She bit down on her lower lip just in time before she blurted out something Chika should never know. While she did desperately want to reveal Kanan's sexual relationship with Ohara Mari, that would mean exposing her own twisted affair with the blonde as well. Her earlier notion of wanting to find out Chika's reaction was long buried by the protective side of her.

No, Chika must not fall like her.

"Kanan-chan's so kind too. Last weekend, when she heard Mito-nee made me clean the warehouse, she came over to help out. Hehe, she lifted all those boxes easily, it was kinda cool."

 _I could've easily done that too. Where the fuck was I? Oh, right._ You swallowed a growl and hung her head with guilt. _I was screwing around with Mari-chan._

She flinched when Chika suddenly pinched her cheeks and pulled her lips upwards. "Smiling is important, You-chan! I've already had to tell Kanan-chan many times, don't make me bug you about it too!"

You didn't know what kind of expression she wore then, but it mustn't be a pleasant sight because Chika cringed and dropped her hands.

"Chika-chan, why are you doing this? Why are you so hung up on… _Kanan_?" She forced that goddam name out between her gritted teeth, and was relieved that she sounded monotonous rather than venomous. No need to unsettle Chika more. "You know how much she loves…Riko-chan, right?"

You was puzzled by the icy chill that licked her spine then, as if she'd uttered something forbidden. Chika also looked bewildered, like she wasn't expecting You to say that at all.

After a prolonged silence with them staring blankly at each other, Chika chuckled quietly and folded her arms behind her. "Yeah, I know Kanan-chan will probably always love Riko-chan, no matter what I do or what anyone else does for that matter. So what's why I'm not doing anything. I just enjoy spending time with Kanan-chan."

She paused and exhaled shakily before peering up at You with a small smile. "I'm not looking for anything in return. I just want to show her that I care about her, that's all. I'm her friend, aren't I?"

It was as if a beast's claws had dug into You's heart with those sincere words. She understood Chika's feelings very well, except the selfish core of her still wanted to possess the latter all for herself. Unable to respond, she simply stood there and stared at the ground while Chika continued browsing around the shop.

She must have zoned out yet again, for Chika has already finished her purchases and was poking her arm for attention.

"Here you go~!" You blinked at the small anchor keychain dangling in front of her face, and then at the grinning girl as the trinket was deposited onto her palm.

"For me?"

"Yup! Yousorou~" Chika saluted and pointedly gazed at You until the latter returned the gesture. "Thanks for shopping with me, You-chan."

"You don't have to, it's my pleasure. I am your friend after all," You mumbled slowly, those pure words tasting vile on her tongue.

"Hehe, nope! You're not just any friend but my best friend!"

You was both pleased and disconcerted by how Chika thought of her. At least, she was still special in the mikan-loving girl's world.

"You think Kanan-chan would like this? She should, since Riko-chan would too," Chika held up a small music box with a pattern of dancing dolphins carved onto the mahogany exterior. Admittedly, this gift was rather quintessentially Kanan and Riko, and it sickened You to her stomach.

"Why do you love her so much? Especially when she doesn't love you back?" She wanted to punch herself for bringing up the topic again but a part of her no longer cared. She was tired of everything. It felt like she had been suppressing so much shit that something's bound to erupt sooner or later.

However, Chika appeared unfazed by such painful question. In fact, her bright eyes had never looked so determined then, and You found herself falling for her best friend all over again. "I just do, You-chan. I won't lie and pretend that I've never wondered about any alternatives. What if I've never met Kanan-chan? What if she's never met Riko-chan? What if none of us ever met? How different would things be?"

She shook her head and, despite appearing so vulnerable, her voice was steadfast. "We can't change what's already happened, You-chan. All you can do is trust how you feel. After all, if you don't trust yourself, who will?"

You opened her mouth only to close it a moment later, unable to refute her words.

"Love isn't meant to be convenient," Chika's tone softened as she gazed at You warmly. "You can't help the way you feel, but the link between two people is real, whether it's reciprocated or not. Sometimes it hurts, or maybe it hurts most of the time, but it drives you forward every day and helps you discover parts of your world that you've never even thought of! And for that, I treasure such feeling."

She lightly touched her chest and whispered. "I love Kanan-chan."

 _And I love you_. You replied inwardly but kept her expression placid. Ah, how would things be like if she hadn't fallen for Chika? She and Mari would not have to cling onto each other in such a despicable, pitiful way. Perhaps, they might even love each other. And maybe, just maybe…

You closed her eyes briefly and saw a picturesque image that was forever etched into her mind. A pair of gentle amber eyes, lustrous burgundy hair that cascaded like a waterfall, and a pretty smile that filled her chest with warmth.

Indeed, how would things be like?

Alas, there was no point in daydreaming at all.

"You are right, Chika-chan," You summoned whatever hadn't died inside her heart to force out an acceptable grin. "You have my support. Let me know if… Kanan and Riko-chan like the gift, ne? I'd like some credit, haha."

The endearing smile that blossomed on Chika's visage dulled the ache a little, making it worthwhile. You hid her clenched fists inside her pockets once more, relishing in the sensation of nails digging into skin and the sticky hotness of trickling blood. Her feeling was not convenient at all.

Love was painfully addictive and delectably despairing.

It was real.


	3. III - Yohane

**A/N:** Thanks for reading! Feedback will be much appreciated.

* * *

 **III. Yohane**

 _"Any hint of it has disappeared; my breath  
Rough and intense, the clues we follow"_

* * *

You let out a ragged sigh and cracked her neck for that satisfying pop before surveying the chaos around her. She took a defiant step forward, smirking at the muffled crunch of shattered mirror shards beneath her shoes. Carelessly, she tossed the broken leg of a chair over the upturned sofa, allowing it to join the rest of its demolished brethren.

Hmm, was there anything else she hadn't destroyed at this pathetic place?

Cold blue eyes swept the dilapidated warehouse but found only pieces of furniture that she had ripped apart. This was a hideout of a small gang she had defeated recently and, as most of the members were still hospitalized, she's been coming and going as she pleased. The remnants of the thugs, after a few more encounters, finally learned to stay the fuck out of her way unless they wanted to be her living punchbags.

Which did happen once or twice.

You cracked her knuckles in mild disappointment. It just wasn't as entertaining if she couldn't sink her fists into flesh and bone. She'd prefer cuts and bruises over wooden splinters stuck in her hands. True annoyance, those prickly things. She's already decorated the wall with fist-sized holes when she inadvertently, as well as deliberately, punched through those thin, wooden planks.

Her phone, purposefully placed at a corner so she wouldn't smash it by accident, vibrated yet again. Whether it was Mari or Chika she cared not. All she knew was that she cannot face either of them yet, not when she was still in this state.

Or else she would do something she would regret.

Her fists itched again, as if complaining about the lack of thrill from her little destruction spree. It wasn't enough. She felt nothing. She needed something, a proper outlet for that mess of emotions churning in her heart.

The phone buzzed once more. Perhaps she should go find Mari and fuck her senseless, or vice versa, whichever fit their mood. The older girl had no qualms about rough play, You knew that very well.

Meanwhile, Chika must be having fun with Kanan. Just a friends' outing, nothing more, and You had vowed to be supportive since the day they went shopping.

So why, _why_ did she feel worse than ever? Whatever clarity she had of the world around her disappeared. All that was left was the desire to hurt.

Kind of like when she first met Mari.

A movement at the corner of her eyes snapped her out of her daze. Instinctively, she moved towards the shadow and swung her fist. Her punch punctured the flimsy plank beside the newcomer's head, and prevented the latter from escaping.

In spite of her vicious welcome, the dark-haired girl did not even flinch and that earned You's respect. "You're sulking here again, oh Lost One."

You rolled her eyes and grunted as she pulled her hand out of the wooden board. She grimaced at the splinters that were stuck to her skin like porcupine quills, resigning herself to a tedious and frustrating period of picking them out later. The shorter girl merely tilted her head and spoke again in her distinctive, husky voice. "What is it that you look for?"

"What does it matter to you?" You snarled rather savagely, hoping her tone was enough to deter the other girl from asking more. "What are you doing here anyway, Yohane-chan?"

Yohane, if that was even her real name, shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't know, but whenever I do find you, you always look like crap, no offense."

"Don't give me that no offense bullshit," You paused and curled her other hand menacingly. "And I _am_ offended. Any last words?"

"Ku ku ku, are you sure you're ready for Yohane-sama's breathtaking eulogy?"

Deadpanning, You was very aware of the fight draining out of her body. Exasperation. Complete and utter exasperation. She really didn't know how to handle this eccentric girl.

Always, whenever she was in this destructive mindset, Yohane would show up and weird her out so that she no longer felt the need to break things. Well, there was that exception, the day she met Mari, but otherwise Yohane never failed to find her.

How did they become sort-of friends again? And she hasn't seen Yohane for a while actually, not since…

Indeed, how long has it been?

Shaking her head, You began to work on her mutilated hand and sighed again when she noticed Yohane's intrigued stare. "What? Never seen something like this before?"

"Who do you think I am? I've definitely seen stupid many times."

"Why you little-" You exhaled deeply and shook her head again. Odd, a comment like that would've sent any other person into the hospital yet, when coming from Yohane, she only felt exasperation.

And a teensy bit of her agreed with the younger girl that, yes, what she did was stupid.

They didn't exchange another line while You robotically bandaged her bleeding hand. Somewhat satisfied with her patch work, she looked up to find Yohane's scornful frown. "What?"

"You're going to break one of these days, y'know."

"How observant," You found herself smiling. "Maybe that's my goal all along?"

"A stupid goal, that's what it is. Have you always been that dumb, Watanabe You?"

"What if I am?" You growled, miffed about being lectured by a junior. "Seriously, why are you here?"

"Well, someone's gotta keep an eye on Bakayou," Yohane drawled condescendingly, and took a careful step back when You approached her with a dangerous scowl. "Calm down, little demon, you don't want to be like _her_."

Rage consumed her fleetingly and she almost reached for the younger girl's neck. That surge of anger vanished as sudden as it came, and only left behind a phantom itch she had no access to. Irritated, she scratched her hair and retrieved her buzzing phone, stuffing it in her pocket without sparing it a glance.

"Aren't you going to check it?"

"I don't feel like it," You muttered and stormed out of the warehouse, deeming it useless to stay any longer.

To her bemusement, Yohane followed silently as if she were a gliding ghost. She'd better not comment on it or else the self-proclaimed fallen angel would consider that a praise. She walked down the street, swerved into an alleyway, out onto the sidewalk, crossed an intersection and even jogged down a trail through the local park.

There was an inexplicably disquieting sensation as soon as she stepped into the area, and Yohane was still walking a careful distance behind her.

Groaning, You halted and whirled around. "Don't you have better things to do? How long are you gonna follow me?"

"Until you open your eyes, duh," Yohane said as if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Ha? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, it's You-san."

Blinking, she turned to face the speaker and vaguely recognized her and her companion as Yohane's friends. However, the two girls both wore sombre expressions as opposed to the friendly smiles as she remembered.

Hanamaru, the petite brunette, glanced at her up and down, her gaze lingering at her bandaged hand. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"And why is that? Why can't I be here?" You thought she must have imagined the flicker of animosity in Hanamaru's unreadable eyes.

"No reason. I've just never seen you around here, that's all." Hanamaru said flatly without her characteristic dialect. The pigtailed redhead, Ruby, nodded mutely and scooted a little closer to her friend.

The two girls appeared so harmless that You felt rather silly for being wary of them. She glanced at the silent Yohane and shrugged. "I didn't even know I would end up at this park. I was trying to shake off your friend. Now that you're here, go take her back."

She shooed the black-haired girl towards them, and was mildly puzzled by the lack of retort when the latter obediently did as she were told. Hanamaru was still staring at You though, and her seemingly all-seeing eyes were quite unsettling.

"You're here to see Riko-san, aren't you?"

Surprised by the brunette's words, You could only look between the three juniors. "Why would I-?"

"Kanan-chan was with her," the younger girl added, "We saw them over there."

Dread and anger slowly filled her mind. Wasn't that accursed person supposed to be spending time with Chika? Sure, Chika knew about Kanan and Riko, but that didn't mean she should endure being together with those two. You knew fully well how such torture was like.

Ruby tugged at Hanamaru's sleeve, prompting the latter to sigh and pat her hand in a comforting manner. "Yes, Kanan-chan was here but she left already, if that's what you're wondering."

You's shoulders drooped in slight relief. Good, Chika wasn't stood up. Fury quickly flooded her senses again though, as she pondered about Kanan's actions. Mari and Riko and even Chika were all being played, weren't they? And Hanamaru and Ruby, who probably didn't know any better, were being involved somehow.

"I should really tell one of them about Mari-chan," You whispered darkly and tried to regulate her breathing. "Heh, if Riko-chan knows about what they've been up to… well, that should finally wake Kanan the fuck up. She won't get away with this."

Just how many people were entangled in Kanan's network of convoluted relationships? And to think, she claimed she loved Riko too…

"No, You-san," Hanamaru's voice was as clear as it was cold. "You're the one who needs to wake up."

Before You could snap a reply, she saw Yohane sadly shaking her head and pointing at her pocket. Her phone was vibrating again. All that negative emotion drained from her tense muscles and she decided to let it go.

"Perhaps," she told the three girls curtly. "But I'm the one who gets to decide that."

Without waiting for a response, she left the park in a hurry. Yohane didn't follow her this time and, already, the calming effect of being in that peculiar girl's presence was disappearing. It was only after she was several blocks away that she took out her phone from her pocket.

Ah, there were several texts from both Mari and Chika, as well as a missed call from the latter. You skimmed through the messages, which were more or less what she expected from those two. Mari wanted to meet up again, while Chika was saying how Kanan liked the music box and wanted to thank You too.

How nauseating.

Still, she was rather curious about the missed call, since Chika usually never called her. She tried returning the call but reached the voicemail.

Disgruntled, she re-dialed the number and couldn't reach Chika this way either.

Again and again, she tried calling but Chika didn't pick up her phone.

Worried now, You paced around the block as she went through a list of where her friend could be and wondered if she should just drop by her place. Chika could be home already and napping. You checked the time and nodded to herself. Sometimes Chika even slept the whole afternoon and only woke up in time for dinner.

But the whole situation still felt off. That eerie sensation since stepping foot into the park hasn't faded.

After the umpteenth try, her call finally connected.

"Chika-chan? Geez, did you fall asleep or something? I tried calling you so many ti-"

You's blood chilled upon hearing that wretched voice.

"Ah. Hey."

"What the fuck are you doing, answering Chika-chan's phone… where is she, what have you done to her?"

"What have I done to her…?" Kanan spoke slowly and emotionlessly. "Well, that's exactly it."

"Wha-?!"

"She can't exactly answer you right now," Kanan's voice was so quiet as if she was far away from the speaker. You frantically pressed her ear against her phone, straining to listen for any clue of their whereabouts.

Was that the tick-tock from Chika's clock? What was that other sound?

Then You heard it.

Chika's shaky gasps, followed by a hitched cry.


	4. IV - Kanan

**A/N:** Nope I haven't forgotten this story! Just got sidetracked there, but I vow to complete it. Any feedback is appreciated!

* * *

 **IV. Kanan**

 _"(But this illusion) has crumbled, hasn't it?"  
"It's a bad dream."_

* * *

Kanan's long, inky hair cascaded wildly over her back and shoulders like waterfall, creating menacing shadows that contradicted her serene expression. Clad in only tank top and jeans, she sat propped up against Chika's bedrest with one toned arm draped over her drawn-up knee.

"Hey. You're here."

You barely heard her. She could only stare blankly at the mop of mikan-colored hair nestled against Kanan's thigh. Chika was sleeping soundly, her hand loosely grasping the hem of Kanan's tank top. The blanket slid down slightly at each even breath she took, revealing more of her naked shoulders and the hickies that blemished her skin. Her shirt, pants, bra and underwear were set in a neat pile near the foot of the bed, as if they were taken off one by one with great care.

You feels herself trembling from sheer rage and horror.

Yet before she could move, Kanan gently brushed away a strand of hair from Chika's face, her gaze filled with fondness. "Shh, you'll wake her up."

Instead of a growl, a strangled whimper was all You could muster. "Don't fucking touch her-"

"Didn't I say?" Kanan peered at her through half-lidded eyes, her mellow tone belied the dangerous glint in those fathomless violet. "Let her dream."

You was paralyzed, her throat parched as she helplessly stared at her beloved once more. She looked so content, wearing that endearing smile, like she was having the most incredible dream. Her cheeks were flushed and her hair mussed was in a way that covered her with seductive charm. She looked so enticing, so beautiful, and so very utterly taken.

Enveloped by the afterglow of sex, she looked like a total stranger.

You's stomach churned in agony, refusing to accept the fact that Chika gave her innocence to someone as wretched as Kanan.

Or was it forcibly stolen?

"She was so sweet, and a bit shy," Kanan murmured as she carefully extracted herself from Chika's embrace, pausing when the younger girl shifted and snuggled. She only resumed moving and got off the bed when Chika's breathing became even again. "She was so worried about not being able to please me… which she shouldn't have to. All she had to do is let go, wouldn't you agree, You?"

You couldn't reply and couldn't move, and she simply could not look away.

Kanan stretched languidly before tying her hair in a messy ponytail. She smiled at Chika again and gingerly tugged at the blanket to cover the sleeping girl, mindful not to disturb her dream. "Yeah, she was so warm, so sweet…"

You marched up to Kanan and threw a punch before she knew it. The taller girl blocked her fist and gripped it tightly, the ghost of a smile still present on her relaxed visage. Growling, You sent an uppercut towards Kanan's chin but her arm was knocked aside as well. You then jerked forward as if about to headbutt Kanan, who instinctively leaned back to avoid the attack. Using the blind spot created by this maneuver, You buried her fist in Kanan's stomach and successfully broke free of the latter's vice grip.

Kanan coughed and took one step backward, but otherwise she appeared unfazed by the attack. You clenched and unclenched her fists, as if to savor the sensation of hitting flesh. In spite of her heart thundering in her ears and her blood boiling beneath her skin, she felt eerily calm. There was a string of expletives at the tip of her tongue, ready to curse Kanan into oblivion, yet nothing left her lips.

She just wanted to hurt. Whether to hurt Kanan or herself, she did not know. Her heart ached so much that she was numb to every other feeling, except for that fleeting exhilaration when she managed to strike Kanan. She needed something more, an actual pain, to truly feel again.

The fact that Kanan was merely watching her made that horrible void even worse. Why wasn't she attacking back? Why did she appear as if she knew everything, as if she understood?

Was that… pity in her eyes?

What, pitying her, because she had claimed Chika? Was that it?

How dare she.

You closed their distance and punched again and again, wildly and unreservedly. However, Kanan either parried or dodged her attacks, her expression never-changing. There were many openings yet the taller girl didn't strike back, not once. All You could feel was Kanan's gaze, as fathomless as the ocean, observing her every movement.

 _Say something, do something!_ You roared through her fists and glare, but somehow she was unable to actually let it out of her throat.

Chika was still sleeping. She did not want Chika to see her like this.

After a while, You's relentless onslaught finally cornered Kanan against the wall opposite of the bed. As if possessed, You picked up a nearby stool and swung it with all her strength.

The wooden limbs snapped with a nauseating thunk and the pieces clattered onto the floor.

A manic grin lit up on You's face as her opponent staggered and collapsed. She glanced at the cracked stool leg in her hand and its mesmerizing sharp edges. Before she could make another move though, she heard a very unsettling sound.

Kanan was laughing.

Even as blood trickled down her face, she continued to chuckle, sounding truly amused as if they were laughing over a bad joke. You breathed heavily, her arm frozen in mid-air with the broken wooden leg held high. She couldn't bring herself to deliver a potentially fatal blow to her foe, but she couldn't drop the weapon either.

She loathed Kanan, despised her so much that she had fantasized many horrific scenarios. But now that she had the opportunity to realize her darkest desire, she hesitated.

Suddenly, she even forgot why she hated Kanan in the first place.

Was it because of Chika? Because of Mari? Or-?

"Do you know how much Chika-chan loves you?" You choked out, her fingers curling tighter around the broken stick. She was mortified by how pathetic she sounded.

"Yeah. I know," Kanna said flatly. The smile was gone from her bloody face.

"And Mari-chan… you're important to her too, y'know?"

"Mari is important to me too."

You could feel her nails digging into her clenched fist, the sharp pain barely suppressing her anger. "Then… what… the fuck… are you doing…?"

"I thought you of all people would understand me best, You," Kanan rasped as she slowly stood up and approached the trembling girl until they were one step apart.

"Me…?"

"I just want to wake up from this nightmare."

Torn between the urge to laugh and scream, You threw away the stick and snarled like a wounded animal. "What kind of bullshit is that? What the fuck does that even mean? Screwing around with Mari-chan? Now Chikan-chan too! What the fuck, Kanan, just what is all this? I thought you love Riko-chan?!"

You didn't notice the slight widening of Kanan's eyes and how they darkened and blanked ominously.

"Chika-chan trusts you! Fuck, even I trust…. I believe you love Ri-"

Stars burst behind her eyelids as pain exploded in her jaw. She blinked up at the ceiling a moment later, still disorientated as to how she ended up on the floor. Kanan's silhouette loomed menacingly over her fallen form for a while, the silence thick and the tension frigid.

"Stand up."

You shakily wiped her chin, growling at how slick her own blood felt against her skin. She lunged at Kanan's legs, using the momentum to pull and pin the older girl onto the floor. The revolting vertigo filled her senses when Kanan rolled with the tackle and threw her to the side. A swift but hard kick dug into her stomach, making her retch and curl up involuntarily.

"Get. Up."

You glared up at Kanan and, frankly, was frightened by how the latter looked at her. It was not hot-blooded rage and indignation like the thugs You had defeated in the past. There was no emotion in those violet eyes. No sorrow, no anger, nothing. Something else was in that hollow gaze though, a chilling intent that she couldn't quite decipher.

Scoffing, You spat out blood and tried to keep up with her bravado. However, each and every one of her punches were blocked and countered and she repeatedly got struck to the ground.

And every time, Kanan told her to get up, before knocking her down again and again.

Perhaps she truly was a masochist, for she fell into a rather pleasant daze from the bone-aching bruises that must be forming from Kanan's fists. The pain was keeping her mind from wandering and she could actually feel her body, instead of that floating sensation as she trudged through every day

How pathetic was this? She was getting her ass handed to her by the person she hated, and she actually felt like laughing?

A mad grin lit up on her face. Was this why Kanan was laughing earlier? Fuck, she was right, maybe she did understand her the most?

You's smile became twisted in agony when Kanan hauled her up by her collars and slugged her face. A strange buzzing resounded in warning in her mind and her eyesight blurred as she peered at her opponent, who raised her fist slowly for one last hit.

Ah, so Kanan wanted her dead. She could see it now.

"K-Kanan-chan, no!"

The grip loosened around her collars and she dropped bonelessly onto the floor. Out of the corner of her dimming vision, she saw Chika grabbing Kanan's arm and attempting to push the older girl away. Her legs were bare and the overly-large shirt drooped to one side, revealing one shoulder, as if she threw on one piece of clothing in a hurry before coming to intervene.

Grunting, You agonizingly sat up. ' _Get away from that person, she's dangerous_!' was what she wanted to say, but only a hacking cough left her mouth. Chika spun around and hastily crouched by her side.

The sight of Chika's tears and horrified expression hurt more than her wounds.

"Y-You -chan? D-Don't talk okay? We'll get you… both of you to the hospital. I-I'll grab something to s-stop the bleeding…"

"No need. Tend to her, Chika. I'll leave."

Chika flinched but she stayed by You's side. "But, Kanan-chan, y-you're hurt too, and-"

"It's okay. Stay," Kanan crouched down as well. "Unless, you want to come with me?"

To You's surprise, Chika shook her head, and that was when You was aware of the crying girl holding her hand.

Kanan smiled at her then, a soft and charming sort of smile that lacked any malice. "You're such good girl, Chika."

It was the same opinion as You's, but hearing it coming from Kanan filled her heart with bitterness. How dare she share the same sentiment?

"I-I'm not," the mikan-haired girl sniffled and squeezed You's hand. She noticed Chika was shaking and borderline hyperventilating.

"You are." Kanan gently pulled her to a hug and gradually, Chika's shallow breathing became even. You could only watch helplessly, her consciousness flickering a little until she realized she wasn't going to pass out into blissful oblivion any time soon. She felt like an outsider, really, seeing how perfectly Chika melted into Kanan's embrace.

"W-What happened?" Chika whispered feebly and peered up at the taller girl. "No, rather, why did you two-?"

Kanan tenderly cupped her cheek and leaned close as if to kiss her, but paused and only placed a soft kiss against her forehead. "All I can say is, I'm sorry for what happened here, for messing up your room. It's better… that I go now."

"Wait, Kanan-chan, don't-"

The older girl shook her head and caressed Chika's disheveled hair before stepping out of the room. She was biting down her lips to muffle her whimpers, her body trembling in great distress.

You cursed herself for unable to comfort the girl she loved, not even a simple hug.

After a deep breath, Chika began to dab and wipe at You's bloody face, using her long sleeve. Inadvertently, You glanced at her exposed shoulder and thighs and the hickies that marked her.

Something ugly flooded You's chest.

"I thought you don't want anything in return?" Though her voice was hoarse and slurred, she knew Chika heard her clearly. Her mind was screaming inside, for her to stop, for her to just hug the distraught girl. This wasn't Chika's fault. She mustn't lose it on Chika. Chika was just a victim. All the blame should be on Matsuura Kanan.

Chika smiled brokenly and gingerly lowered her hand. "You're right, You-chan. I'm so, _so_ , sorry. I wasn't… I didn't plan to…"

See, it was all Kanan's fault. She must have coerced or seduced Chika somehow, using her feelings for sex. You sighed shakily and was about to reach for Chika's hand when the latter's words froze her.

"But when we… when she held me, I-I realized how much I wanted…" Chika sobbed and hid her face behind her face as if ashamed. "I so wanted to be s-someone to her. I so wanted to be l-loved in return too, so I-I…"

"You lied to me."

"W-What?"

You coldly stared at Chika's bewildered and tear-stained face. "Before, when we were shopping, when you got that music box, you gave me that whole speech and… what a fucking idiot I was, for believing your words! You didn't want anything in return, heh… well, in the end, you're just human. Right, that's better this way, actually."

"Y-You-chan?"

"Like you, Chika-chan, I'm only human." You ignored the warning voice in the back of her cloudy mind. She roughly grasped at Chika's shirt and pulled.

"Wha-"

Chika's lips tasted salty like tears and coppery like blood.

You's broken phone lays forgotten in the corner, the anchor keychain stained with maroon.


	5. V - Dia

**A/N:** oops forgot to upload this chapter here too, it was updated on my tumblr and pixiv a while ago. Any feedback is appreciated!

* * *

 **V. Dia**

 _"Even as I search, I don't want to find you  
Once I find you, I have to attack " _

* * *

You absolutely hated the hospital.

There was something about the artificial scents, the inhuman bleach-white wall and the carefully neutral expressions of the staff that put her on edge. This was a place where some lives were saved and some were not. People came to the hospital for a reason, whether to seek treatment for ailments, to receive operations so they could be functional again, or just to visit those who were unfortunate enough to become confined.

Here, even the toughest and proudest of people were forced to shed their cover, exposing the vulnerable part of themselves to complete strangers.

You despised that.

She didn't mind the pain. Her injuries would eventually heal without her ever visiting the hospital. She had long grown numb to the concept of time, so she was fine with waiting in spite of the inconveniences her limited movements would cause.

But she promised Chika that she would go to the hospital.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

 _Chika tasted so sweet and warm. Just as Kanan said._

 _Infuriated by the reminder, You shifted and deepened the kiss. How dare Kanan had claimed Chika. No, she shall mark Chika as hers. Watanabe You was just a human too. Was it so wrong to seek physical connection with the girl she loved? Chika wasn't resisting at all, so perhaps there was hope for her?_

 _You kissed the corner of Chika's mouth, jaw and neck, relishing in the warm and soft skin as she pushed the latter onto the floor. She palmed up Chika's smooth thigh but found herself unable to move any higher. Her trembling hand stopped at the hem of the oversized shirt, frozen by an automatic decree not to trespass the forbidden._

I am hurting her, aren't I?

 _"You-chan…" Chika's hand gingerly cupped You's cheek, her movement so gentle as if mindful of the horrid bruises that marred her wet face. Wet from blood or tears, You no longer knew, but the soothing sensation was a jarring contrast to that animalistic desire gripping her mind earlier._

 _Now snapped back to her senses, You recoiled and got off Chika._

 _"I-I… I was…"_

 _What the fuck did she do to Chika? What had she almost fucking done to the girl she swore to protect?_

 _Ashamed and horrified, You staggered towards the door, desperate to leave this place so she could somewhat think again._

 _"You-chan! Wait-"_

 _"Don't come after me!" You gripped the door frame and kept her gaze at the ground. She was too scared to look back and see Chika's expression. "I shouldn't be anywhere near you right now. I don't trust myself, Chika-chan. Who knows what else I might do?"_

 _There was shuffling noise and quiet steps until she felt Chika tug at the back of her shirt. "Then promise me you'll go to the hospital or clinic at least, okay? Y-you're really hurt. I-I want you to be o-okay."_

 _"… even after what I've done to you?"_

 _"You're still my best friend-" Chika stopped abruptly, and You carefully loosened her grip on the doorframe. "You're still You-chan. P-Promise me you'll get your injuries checked. Afterwards, please c-come back and w-we'll talk, okay?"_

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

You breathed shakily and slouched in her seat. Even though she had picked an unoccupied bench at an inconspicuous corner, she could still feel people glancing her way. Such scrutiny angered and amused her at the same time. She hated the innocently curious and pitiful eyes, condemning these strangers for drawing their own conclusion about her story when they didn't even have a damn clue.

On the other hand, well, she wasn't as invincible as she believed herself to be.

Images of what happened at Chika's place kept assaulting her mind. Groaning, she sank deeper in her seat and pressed her clenched fists against her face, though that did nothing to alleviate the nausea. Pain was scorching her body, yet it did not originate from her wounds but from her chest and head. The guilt was making it so damn hard to breathe.

Sure, she was fuelled by rage and a myriad of hideous emotions back then, but that did not excuse her actions. She could no longer blame Kanan, now that she had done the same thing.

No, not the same. Chika at least loved Kanan, while Watanabe goddamn You was supposed to be Chika's best friend, yet…

And there was something else that perturbed her. When she kissed Chika, memories of another girl flashed faintly but unquestionably behind her closed eyelids.

Mari.

You whimpered and tightened her fists. Just what the fuck was wrong with her? She frequently pictured Chika whenever she had sex with Mari, yet now that she had briefly and dastardly got to taste the girl of her dreams, her thoughts had gone back to Mari?

What exactly did she feel guilty for? For almost violating Chika? For cheating on Mari even though they weren't in a relationship? Or was it for-

"Breathe, and try to relax."

You felt an unfamiliar presence sit beside her, and a steady hand prevented her from bolting away, not that she was in any condition to do so anyway. The rhythmic pats on her back helped her get her breathing under control and gradually, she was able to unclench her fists and sit up.

"…thanks, I guess. Who are you?"

The stranger had long black hair and a severe expression that commanded the primal part of You to be civil towards her.

"Dia." She said curtly, and stared at her. Though uncomfortable with Dia's searching gaze, she remained still.

"…I'm You."

Dia nodded distractedly, as if satisfied by the formality of exchanging names but not really caring about the knowledge itself. "You are waiting for your turn?"

You glanced down the hallway, where the number of people lining up had not diminished since she last checked. "Yeah, I guess. Maybe I've already missed my turn, I don't know."

Dia did not seem happy with her response. She stood up and gestured for her to follow. Though bemused, You decided to see what this stranger wanted and hobbled after her. She stubbornly shook off Dia's hand when the latter tried to help her.

"I can walk by myself."

"I can see that you are doing a fine job of it," Dia said flatly. Warningly.

You winced but allowed the taller girl to support her weight afterwards. "So, where are we going?"

"To a nurse station. Get your wounds looked at at least."

"I can just do that? Don't I have to report in, wait in line or some sh-" You stopped herself, thinking Dia most likely would not appreciate the coarse language. "Er, isn't there some kind of rule?"

"There is protocol, but I did not expect you to be concerned about that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Dia shrugged but did not offer more explanation. There were curious glances as they made their way down the hallways, but by the time they reached the station, the nurses there only gave Dia a brief nod in greeting and let them be. Dia bid You to sit in an empty chair while she perused the antiseptics, bandages and other items with great familiarity.

"I am here frequently enough that I sometimes help out," Dia elaborated when she noticed You's bewildered expression.

"What… is this even allowed? Seriously, who are you?"

"Dia, I have said that already."

You scowled at the taller girl, trying to see if she was joking or teasing. However, Dia's features remained as infallible as ever. Sensing that she would not receive any more explanations, You allowed Dia to treat her wounds.

"Quite the fight you were in."

"Cheh, you should've seen what I did to the other person."

"I was not complimenting you."

You was about to retort, but she had to muster all her strength and pride to muffle a pained squeak when Dia tightened the bandages around her arm. Again, her base instincts commanded her to just shut her mouth and let the older girl check her wounds. For some reason, she felt like a chided child when Dia's disapproving eyes swept over her bruised stomach.

"Even if I were to advise you to actually wait for a professional, you would not wait, would you?"

"Nope. You've treated most of my injuries now. Whatever internal ones I have, feh, they'll heal eventually."

Unimpressed, Dia prodded at her stomach, making her flinch and hastily roll down her top.

"Very well then. You are free to go now."

You rolled her shoulders, glanced over her forearms and touched her face. The bandages were itchy, the cuts dabbed with iodine stung like hell, and her tummy still felt sore but she knew that numbness would set in soon enough. It always did.

However, she did feel slightly better overall and, this way, she could tell Chika that she had fulfilled her promise.

Time to leave this suffocating place, but there was no reason not to be polite to the helpful albeit stringent stranger.

"Thanks… for all this. You didn't have to though, so why did you?"

Dia tilted her head. "I felt like it."

"Huh. Well, I sometimes just go with the flow too so I guess I can relate?" You shrugged and stood up to stretch a little. She tried to think of what else to say but nothing came to mind. "Whatever. Maybe we'll see each other again. Later-"

"You feel like you're unworthy of her forgiveness, do you not?"

You tensed. "How did you-?"

"I do not know what happened to you, and I do not understand how you feel, but… this sense of helplessness, and the need to seek punishment, is something I can relate to."

Dia slowly stood up and looked down at her. They stared at each other for a moment until the taller girl's deep voice struck her again.

"You have to learn to forgive as well. You are not the only one suffering. There is nothing to gain from allowing wounds to fester."

Perhaps she had imagined it, but there was a flicker of something foreboding in Dia's impenetrable gaze. You swallowed hard, now unsettled by Dia's proximity.

"Let it heal," the older girl hissed.

"Don't speak as if you know me, stranger."

Dia smiled coldly, but the slight change was fleeting and her expression reverted to the blank one.

"I know you better than you know yourself, Watanabe You."

You's eyes widened. She never told Dia her surname, did she? Had she met this Dia before? Not trusting herself to reply properly, she shook her head and walked away at a brisk pace. To her relief, she did not hear Dia following her, though she did feel Dia's gaze until she turned corner.

She leaned against the wall and exhaled shakily. Something clicked in her mind and she pursed her lips in confusion.

Dia was Riko-chan's friend, wasn't she? Indeed, whenever Riko wasn't with Kanan, there were usually two other girls that Riko hung out with. One must be this Dia, and who was the other one?

"You should be nicer to her."

"Fuc- where did you come from?" You snarled raspily and clutched her chest in indignation. It was only because her throat was parched and sore, otherwise she might have yelped in shock. How pathetic would that be? She glared at Yohane, whose smirk showed just how pleased she was at her reaction.

"I'm wherever you want me to be, You." The dark-haired girl stood out in the empty bleached hallway, donned in her signature gothic dress. The black and white contrast was almost ridiculous, really.

"That's creepy. You're lucky I'm not in the mood or I'd pound you the ground, hospital or not."

Unfazed by the threat, Yohane made a pose. "Tsk tsk, here you go again. I know you want some company, so be glad the great Yohane-sama is here to provide you just that."

"No I don't. Seriously, why do you always pop up randomly? What, you like me or something?"

"Dream on. I'm just worried."

The younger girl's response caused You to frown. Worried, like how Chika worried about Kanan? You stared at her suspiciously. "What do you mean?"

"I've always been the voice at the back of your mind, so I'll be here whenever you need me." Yohane held up her chin, grinning proudly with such sincerity that You didn't know whether to feel weirded out or touched by the concern.

"Er, thanks? Not that I need you or anything-"

"Yeesh, what happened to you this time though? I thought you looked like crap before but now, wow."

There went the heartwarming feeling.

"I… was in a fight alright?"

Yohane whistled and crossed her arms. "Really? Finally met your match? Never seen you so beaten up before."

The reprieve from their meaningless banter vanished and You was reminded of the fight again. Kanan. Chika. Herself. Mari. Riko.

"Fuck off…" You stuffed her hands in her pockets and stormed away. Yohane really knew how to push her buttons, didn't she? And it frustrated You to no end that she could never follow through with her threats. As much as she wanted to scare off Yohane a little, she just couldn't bring herself to harm the eccentric girl.

After a few moments of silence, You turned around and found that she was alone in the hallway. Guilt seeped through her conscience and she called out softly. "Hey, I was just… it's not like you to just back off when I tell you to. When have you ever listened to me anyway?"

There was no response, as if Yohane had really left the area. The eerily quiet environment made her realize that she was still in the damn hospital. She rubbed the bridge of her nose and sighed, deciding that she really needed to get out of this place before she lost her mind or something. She needed fresh air. As she looked for a directory for this accursed labyrinth and passed by many rooms in this secluded wing, one of the nameplates caught her attention.

Tsushima Yoshiko.

You frowned and glanced at the name again. She was certain that she had never heard of the name before yet the sense of familiarity was there.

Shaking her head, she resumed her search for the exit.


	6. VI - Hanarmaru and Ruby

**A/N:** Only noticed now that I forgot to upload here... it was uploadedontumblr months ago...? Anyway, I will finish this story eventually, just have other stuff I need to finish first before I can come back to this.

* * *

 **VI. Hanamaru & Ruby**

" _But I want to go back"  
"To that day, the day we met"  
"My one wish goes ungranted"_

* * *

"You're not asleep, are you?"

You's arm remained draped over her closed eyes. She sensed the weight of someone sitting down beside her head as well as the pleasant floral scent that always seemed to accompany the speaker. She did not answer, and she refused to budge from where she was sprawled on her back across the bench with her legs dangling over the edge.

A quiet sigh, though there was a hint of exasperated fondness. "Still, don't sleep here in the open, you might get sick."

You's lips twitched in humor. "Isn't there a saying that says bakas don't get sick?"

She grinned behind her arm when the newcomer playfully ruffled her hair. "Don't call yourself a baka, silly."

"Hey! You're messing up my hair!"

"It's already messy to begin with though?"

"How mean," You growled and sat up abruptly, batting the hand away from her head. She chuckled at the startled squeal and laughed even more so when the other girl punched her arm. "That's weak, y'know."

Another punch, this time more forceful, though still a kitten's lick compared to the fist fights she was used to. Even then, she rubbed at her abused arm and whined. "Ow~! I'm gonna have a bruise tomorrow."

"Baka…"

"Ah, so I really _am_ a baka?"

Okay, she deserved that pinch, but her bandaged cheek was still sore from the brawl yesterday and she couldn't suppress her flinch. The same hand then gently caressed the injured area, as if apologizing for inflicting further pain. She closed her eyes briefly to relish the sensation before opening her eyes and turning to face her companion at last.

"Hey."

"Hey you." Amber eyes were filled with concern as the burgundy-haired girl lightly brushed her thumb over the bandage. "Why do you always get into fights-?"

"Now now, I don't start them. Trouble comes looking for me, not the other way around," You smiled wryly as she slouched in her seat. "They're not that bad, and overall it's good exercise, Riko-chan."

"No, it's not. One of these days you'll get really hurt, and I don't want that." Riko said sternly, her fingers curling near You's cheek as if threatening to pinch it again.

You backed away and pouted. "I know I know. Geez, you and Chika-chan won't ever stop nagging at me, will you? Be proud, I stopped the fight before it got too bad, and came here to rest."

"I see. Good, there's improvement at least."

Airily, Riko straightened and pulled out a familiar sketchbook from her bag. She ignored You's questioning gaze and began to doodle the scenery. You's blue eyes swept over the park, noting the few people strolling along the path, a kid playing with his dog over there, some flying their kites beyond the pond, and an old couple seated at a nearby bench and simply enjoying the nice weather. Everything seemed so picturesque, the tranquil atmosphere so good that it almost felt fake, especially compared to the frequent fights she's gotten herself involved in.

Nevertheless, this wasn't bad. This wasn't bad at all. She could get used to such peace.

She listened to the quiet scratching sounds of the pencil as Riko sketched, smiling at the occasional pauses when the latter wasn't pleased with the lighting or the composition.

"You're not mad at me?"

"Why would I be mad at you?"

"Aha, you _are_ mad at me," You peered at her friend and scooted closer. In response, Riko scooted away and resumed drawing like she wasn't even there. Pouting again, You repeated her action and received the same reaction. The cycle continued until Riko was barely seated at the edge of the bench.

Huffing, she set down her sketchbook and scowled at the grinning You. "What?"

"Finally made you look at me."

Riko raised an eyebrow and exhaled deeply. "Look, I'm not mad at you. Like I said, I'm just worried. Stop getting into fights so often. Chika-chan's worried, Kanan-chan too."

You rolled her eyes. "I can handle myself. Kanan should know that better than either of you."

"Just promise us… promise me, okay?"

It was really difficult to say no, not under such pair of piercing, pretty eyes. You shrugged, holding her arms akimbo. "Alright! I'll try to stay out of trouble. In exchange though, I wanna see this!"

Before Riko could react, You snatched the sketchbook out of her lap and flipped through the pages. She hummed in appreciation at the detailed drawings, of still life and of animals. The recent pages, however, were filled with portraits of a ponytailed girl. Jogging, stretching, napping, drinking a bottle of water, or just smiling at the viewer.

Snickering, You wasn't surprised to see Riko's face turning beet red. "Does Kanan know?"

"Of course, but that doesn't make this any less embarrassing. Can I have it back already?"

Taking pity on the blushing girl, You held out the sketchbook and chuckled again when Riko hugged it protectively against her chest. Silence fell upon them for a while, long enough for You to shuffle uncertainly. Was that too much teasing?

Just as she was about to apologize, Riko spoke up in a muffled voice. "Do you believe in true love, You-chan?"

For some reason, the question stung her more than any physical injury ever did. She immediately thought of a mikan-haired girl and her beautiful smile. This thought alone pained her just as much as it made her happy. Self-conscious, she scratched the back of her hair and mumbled. "… yeah, I do."

Riko giggled at her response. The soft sound tickled inside her heart, yet she didn't feel insulted or annoyed.

"Why do you ask anyway? You're the happy couple, not me."

"Just curious, that's all."

"Riko-chan…"

"It's true, I just wanted to know your thoughts."

You folded her arms, trying to read the soft smile on Riko's visage. Was that bliss? Would she look like that too, if Chika were to accept her feelings? But that wouldn't ever be possible, would it? After all, Chika loved someone else, someone who was also her friend.

And that person happened to be Riko's girlfriend as well.

"Okay, now that you know, what're you going to do?"

Riko turned away and looked into the sky, not smiling but not frowning either. Her whispered reply drifted with the breeze, so quiescent that You almost didn't catch it.

"I'm going to set things right."

* * *

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

* * *

"Don't fall asleep here, you'll get sick."

You grunted but did not move to acknowledge the speaker. Her arm was draped over her face, shielding her closed eyes from the sunlight as she remained sprawled on her back across the bench. Her mind was a mess, chaotic even long after she had left the hospital. She's wandered back to the park and found herself reminiscing her time with Riko.

Truth be told, she missed chatting with Riko. She didn't remember what happened after that, though she did recall avoiding her since that puzzling conversation.

Why though?

You gritted her teeth and turned to her side, resting her arm against the cool and rough surface of the bench's backrest. Ah, she didn't want to be prodded about her feelings for Chika or talk about love, as subtle as Riko had been. Sometimes, You admired how Chika and Riko remained good friends under such circumstances, while she and Kanan…

Deep exhale. She clenched her fist and tried to ignore the throbbing pain from her wounds. That Dia may have cleaned and bandaged them, but her words had torn open something more painful. Perhaps she should go back to Chika now, as she promised she would. She couldn't find her phone, which was prolly broken and still back at Chika's place, and that was the excuse she kept telling herself to delay facing Chika again.

Again, she recalled Riko's soft smile when the latter spoke of true love. How could Matsuura fucking Kanan betray her? Dragged Chika into this?

 _Someone to share your joy and pain, someone to talk to… someone to hug_.

Only Mari understood You. She didn't want to see either Chika or Riko. She wanted to see Mari at this moment, desperately so. In spite of whatever Mari had with Kanan, You still wanted to be with her. It wasn't just about screwing each other senseless, or just having someone period. No, it wasn't something as paltry as sex.

It was so much more than that, You was certain of it.

Her thoughts were rudely jostled out of her mind when petite hands pushed her further along the bench to make room. You's legs dangled awkwardly over the edge while her face was uncomfortably squashed between her arm and the backrest. Growling in annoyance, she sat up and glared down at the short brunette and her pigtailed friend.

"What the fuck?"

"Language please," Hanamaru was unfazed, her thick novel open in her lap. She didn't even glance in You's direction. "You were in my seat, so I moved you."

You pulled back her fist, fully intending to at least punch the spot beside the girl's shoulder to scare her. She stopped in mid-motion however, when her glare found Ruby's green eyes. They were unnerving, emotionless and severe.

It was the same way Dia looked at her, back in the hospital.

Deep breath. In and out. In and out. You clenched her eyes shut and slouched in her seat. The tense silence was intermittently interrupted by the rustling sound of Hanamaru flipping the pages of her book. She should just leave and save herself from this inexplicable stress, but her pride refused to give in. Why should she get out of the way? She was here first!

"… there are so many other benches available, why this one?" You looked around the park, noting the lack of passersby, empty benches and the dried-up pond.

"I always read my book with Ruby-chan here, and I don't intend to change that," Hanamaru's gaze remained fixated on the novel's small print. Ruby appeared to be reading over her friend's shoulder as well.

"A stubborn one, aren't you?"

"Not as much as you, You-san."

"Ha! You think you know me?" She angrily recalled their encounter days ago, also here at the park. "What, you want me to wake up? Is that it?"

The brunette shrugged, her voice flat with nonchalance. It was clear that she didn't give a fuck. "Awake, asleep, daydreaming, does that matter? You remain the same no matter what. Why do I even try?"

Again, You was seized by the violent urge to hurt the smaller girl. Not out of desire to cause her pain, but rather to solicit some sort of emotion out of her and her friend. Any other girls would have fled or screamed in fear if You were to glare at them like this, but not these two. It wasn't as if You enjoyed terrifying younger girls, but such reaction would have been _normal_ at least.

Hanamaru and Ruby's lack of expected response was unsettling.

You covered her face and chuckled sardonically. Did she just wish for normality? What a fucking joke! She thrived in chaos. Only in bloody fistfights did she feel alive. Peace? What peace? She will never know peace.

It was not meant for her. Fact.

"What's that book? Is it really that interesting?"

"Oh it is. Riko-san recommended it to us. We would like to finish it."

You pursed her lips, unsurprised by their acquaintance of the artist. They came to the park often enough, they might have even bonded over common interests. Literature was a form of art too. Riko used to mention her friend Dia preferring classic literature, while her other friend enjoyed fantasy and in particularly the occult.

Right. Yohane and Riko were good friends, and that was how she came to know the eccentric gothic girl.

"Where's your friend?"

Neither Hanamaru nor Ruby answered her.

"I was looking for her."

Hanamaru turned a page, her expression unreadable as able. "Then keep looking."

"Smartass," You rubbed her chin. "Odd, I swore you used to speak in an odd accent or dialect of some sort, at least around her. Yohane-chan I mean."

"Is that so?" There was an indiscernible tremor in her voice.

"Yup. Well, I don't give a shit how you speak, just pointing it out."

Silence again.

"How about you?" She shifted her attention to the pigtailed girl. "Say something. You mute or what?"

Ruby blinked and stared at her with those disturbingly blank eyes again. Her lips remained sealed.

"You _are_ mute then."

Ruby returned her gaze back to the book.

"No seriously, I was looking for your friend. She was talking to me but then she disappeared out of the blue-"

The book was slammed shut so abruptly that it made a cringe-worthy thud. There was something ugly and abhorrent in Hanamaru's brown eyes. It was fleeting, but the intensity of such emotion had You tense defensively.

"Dia-san is with Yoshiko-chan."

Ruby started trembling so Hanamaru gently held her hands, the gesture so drastically different than her vicious glare towards the older girl.

"Yo…shiko?" You was distinctly aware of her own heart pounding within her ribcage, like a trapped beast frantically trying to break free. Yohane… Yoshiko… Tsushima Yoshiko?

"Yoshiko-chan is still in a coma," Hanamaru whispered darkly. "So perhaps you've been hallucinating, or you just have a sick sense of humor. Whatever it is, please stop it. It's just us left now, Ruby-chan and I. The moment you even attempt to hurt Ruby-chan, I _swear_ you will be begging for death the moment I'm done with you."

Such savage words sounded so uncharacteristic and outlandish from a petite girl, let alone someone like Hanamaru. Yohane's friend was usually smiling, playfully berating the gothic girl's antics and cuddling Ruby.

That Hanamaru would never hurt a fly. The brunette here though would follow through with her threat, word for word.

You felt sick.

Back at the warehouse, back in the hallways of the hospital, and countless other times, she has been talking to thin air? But Yohane had replied to her. Or was it her own conscience, taking the form of the girl she considered trustworthy?

"Onee-chan is wholly devoted to Yoshiko-chan now."

Both Hanamaru and You's eyes widened as they looked at Ruby, whose expression was serene and somehow that sent a chill down You's limbs.

"I loved her, you know? Yoshiko-chan. But I've been useless and I'm scared of facing her again," Ruby was smiling. "Maru-chan too. Maru-chan loved Onee-chan, ne?"

Hanamaru cringed, her carefully controlled expression crumbling to that of pain. "That's-"

"It's okay. I know. That's from before. We have each other now and that's all that matters," Ruby held up the brunette's hand and interlaced their fingers, the gesture full of tenderness that it inexplicably frightened You even more. "Even then, I still wish we could go back, back to the way everything used to be."

"That's the one wish I cannot help you with, Ruby-chan," Hanamaru pulled her hand away, her eyes churning with raw emotions. "Like what Kanan-chan said, it's just a nightmare, one that none of us can ever wake up from."

Ruby nodded slowly, her lips pressed in a thin line while her expression returned to that unnerving, vacant one like before.

It took a moment for You to realize she was covered in cold sweat. She wiped at her damp brow with her forearm and almost tripped in her haste to stand up.

"I-I'm going to g-go see Riko-chan. She… She can help me, yeah. She always has."

Hanamaru stared at her coolly and gestured at the trees on the other side of the field. "We just went to see her. She's over there."

You staggered away as fast as her failing legs could bring her. She knew there was a hidden entrance to the park in that direction. She didn't usually take this path, as it was covered with undergrowth which made it annoying to walk through. However, she used to be familiar with the area, as it granted its visitors privacy and a natural veil of filtered lights from the canopy tops. Riko loved sketching here.

 _And this is where I…_

She stumbled out of the woods and found the small gate that faced the intersection of a busy street. Gasping for breaths, she stood still and stared at the ponytailed girl crouched beside the dilapidated fence.

Kanan was holding a bouquet of roses, tears sliding down her cheeks and raining upon a withered wreath against the corner. She gingerly placed the bouquet beside a photo frame, her lips moving with whispered words.

You found it excruciating to breathe, her heart aching like someone had clenched it tight in their grip.

Kanan stood up listlessly and looked at You with dead eyes.

"I'm going to set things right."


End file.
